The Three Month Siesta - Part II

I took a super long time off from writing with good reason.  Earlier this month, I wrote about the relationship that I couldn't maintain, no matter how hard I tried.  Turns out that I like masculine guys, and no matter how amazing some of our more feminine brethren are, I just can't make a relationship happen with them.  Live and learn.

But regarding my siesta from writing, perhaps even more telling was my drama at work. 

Statistically, most young attorneys hate their jobs. 

They don't "dislike" it.  Oh, no.  They absolutely hate it.  It takes a few years to figure out what you're doing and realize that the stress of our job is nothing to jump off a building about - it's just part of the profession, and you have to leave work everyday with the right perspective. 

Unlike the statistical norm, I usually like my job. 

There are even days that I love it. 

For anonymity purposes, I'm not going to delve into the exact details of what I do besides saying that I consider myself on the good-guy side of the law. 

In past professions, I have always been a shining star at work, the golden boy (so to speak).  And at my current firm, I certainly started off that way; I took on an immense amount of responsibility for a first year associate and excelled with flying colors. 

But then I was assigned the project from hell. 

One thing that I should mention is that I work with very, very smart people, some of whom are even brilliant, in my opinion.  The attorney who assigned me the project from hell is one of those brilliant people.  In no way, shape, or form does my level of intellect even approach hers.  I will call her "Smartzilla."  Smartzilla is very pleasant on the service, but is a vicious trial attorney at heart.

Smartzilla assigned me the lengthy research project in June with no firm deadline - "Just work on it and complete it as soon as possible." 

Well, I got slammed in June with other projects, projects with hard deadlines.  Consequently, I pushed Smartzilla's project to the back burners. 

Four weeks later, right before I was going to leave to see my family for the Fourth of July, Smartzilla sent me an email with a "!" asking about the project. 

When I told her that I hadn't started, I got reamed and insulted. 

Then, trying to finish it before I left for home, I worked several super late nights.  Her response to my finished project was "this is terrible - if a summer intern did this, we wouldn't hire them."  I apparently hadn't understood what she was looking for.  With clarification, I set back to work, only to be insulted with every draft I submitted. 

After I spent my Fourth of July holiday working on the project, she finally accepted my work.   

Thrilled to be finished with the project, I went out and got drunk. 

But the drinking didn't wash away the bad impression I left on Smartzilla.  She now questions not only my intelligence, but also my work ethic and judgment. 

It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation, and only one bad project to ruin it.  However, I am committed to rising back to the top of the golden ladder.  It will just take some time. 

Comments

[jay]

even with months between posts, i'm still gonna come back. love to read more from u

j

[Shayla]

I wouldn't take Smartzilla's BS to heart. First, I don't believe one bad project will ruin you. But Smartzilla's reputation may also soften the impact of what you consider a bad project. She sounds unreasonable and unable to communicate. Points your collegues and superiors will probably take into account!

Glad to see you posting again!

[tristan]

This is a tough one... but bear in mind there may be some truth in your boss' feedback. If she sees that you're indeed a shallow opportunist, she's probably not wrong in her assessment.

[Jay]

I just started working just over a year ago and while right now I do also seem to be the current golden boy I am a bit worried about that inevitable assignment that I will get that will leave me with a bit less shine.

The way I look at it however, is that when it does happen, maybe it'll be at a time when I need a wakeup call to push myself THAT much further.